T’was the night before Christmas and all throughout space
Not an ewok was stirring, nor any other race.
Helmets all hung by the teleporter with care
For a fat, mystical elf who soon would beam there.
Catkind kittens and children snuggled in beds
While baby groot sprouts danced in their heads.
Worf in his kerchief after Guinan’s nightcap
Our ship settled down for a long cryo-nap.
When out by the portal there arose such a clatter,
I, the StarLord, skipped in to deal with the matter.
Away through the swish-doors I flew like a jedi
Tore out my blaster and blew locks to save time.
Laser-beam shots from the robot psycho
Caused a crisis of conscience for her AI fellows.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
But a miniature Tardis and cyber reindeer
With a curly-eared elf so lively and quick
I knew in a moment Yoda had this scene fixed.
Slow, but determined, the Sontaran troops came
And crushed our intruders, shouting the enemies’ names
Romulan, Dalek, Vader, and Thanos
Palpatein, Kahn, Ronan, and GLaDOS
Use old bleeping robots to blinking squares on the walls,
Rid the decks of these bad guys, and slash away all!
As Naboo leaves whirl when their starfighters fly
And villains with poor aim monologue as they die,
So throughout our ship, all evil we slew
Then beamed their carcasses to Knowwhere, too.
Then, I heard deep within the Tardis’ roomy insides
The boot clomps of one who’d eaten cookies for life.
As I scratched on my head and drew near to see more,
A silver haired cocoa addict burst from the door.
His red furry armor covered his head to his feet
He thundered with laughter–not exactly discreet.
A wink of his eye and a flip of white beard
Let me know this was no borg man to be feared.
With a Vulcan hand greeting, he got straight to work
Setting out presents and candy, then turned with a jerk.
Laying his bag over his shoulder, still silent
He whistled at the Doctor, as if he were his pilot
The Time Lord bowed to Saint Nick, as he shared his insight,
“Share Christmas with all, in earth or space flight!”
I’ll be taking a break to celebrate Christmas and ring in 2016. Come back to see the next short story segment soon!